How to Properly Hold And Use Chopsticks so You Don’t Make a Fool of Yourself in Asian Restaurants

Let’s admit it—there’s a special kind of humility that comes with sheepishly asking for a fork in an Asian restaurant. Despite what everyone says about chopsticks being easy to use, they often seem more like twin wooden riddles than utensils. Well, not to rub soy sauce into the wound, but it is that easy, and with the right technique, you can conquer the art of holding chopsticks and enjoy your sushi or noodles like a pro. Here’s how.

Do Different Countries Hold Chopsticks Differently?

First, a little background: chopsticks aren’t one-size-fits-all across Asia. In Japan, chopsticks tend to be shorter with tapered tips, which makes them perfect for handling delicate foods like sushi. Chinese chopsticks are longer and thicker, ideal for grabbing chunks of food or stir-fry. Korean chopsticks are flat and often made of metal, giving them a unique feel and weight. While the design varies, the basic grip remains consistent. So, once you master the technique, you’ll be chopstick-ready anywhere.

How to Properly Hold Chopsticks, A Step-by-Step Guide

Let’s get into the nitty-gritty of holding chopsticks the right way. The first thing to know is that chopsticks work like tongs—one stick stays still while the other moves to pinch food. Start by holding one chopstick as if it’s a pen, placing it between your thumb, index finger, and middle finger. This is the one you’ll move.

Next, position the second chopstick so it rests in the crook of your thumb and against your ring finger. This one stays stationary. Now, practice opening and closing the sticks like a pair of tweezers. The trick is to use only your index and middle fingers to move the top chopstick while keeping the bottom one stable. It might feel awkward at first, but with a little practice, it becomes second nature.

Golden Rules for Eating Out with Chopsticks

Using chopsticks isn’t just about technique; it’s also about etiquette, especially in Asian restaurants where customs are key. Always pick up food gently—stabbing or skewering is a major no-no. If you’re sharing dishes, use the serving utensils provided rather than your chopsticks to avoid double-dipping. When not in use, rest your chopsticks neatly on the holder or edge of your plate. Crossing them haphazardly on your bowl is considered impolite.

What Not to Do with Chopsticks

Now that you’ve got the basics down, let’s cover what you absolutely should not do with chopsticks unless you’re aiming to make a fool of yourself. First, never stick them upright in a bowl of rice—it resembles offerings made at funerals in some cultures and is considered very bad luck.

Don’t point your chopsticks at someone; it’s rude and can come off as aggressive. Clicking them together or using them as drumsticks is equally frowned upon—it’s dining, not a jam session. Finally, avoid using your chopsticks to move dishes around; they’re for food, not as extensions of your hands.